Berlin very surprisingly came home today but is by far not out of the woods. He's very weak, very exhausted and just barely drinking.

I'm not sure what the week will bring with him but for now we're taking it day by day.

We're hopeful he gets better but are realistic that he may not. We keep saying "poor guy" and "poor kitty".

If he makes it through the week he'll have an ecocardiogram at the end of the week.

Poor guy; he's had such a rough weekend. Alex picked him up tonight so that we could give him his two pills and he let out a sad little cough. He's still purring non stop, just like the old Berlin we know.

UPDATE ON BERLIN:

My vet called me tonight at 5:30pm to tell me that Berlin was getting worse as the afternoon went on and that I need to move him to Animal Emergency as they have 24 hour medical services and they didn't.

I went and picked up Berlin from my vet and talked to him the whole way to Animal Emergency. He cried like he normally does when I call his name. He was responsive and purred the whole way. I was warned that the stress of moving him could kill him and I figured if he was purring and crying he was still alive.

We get to Animal Emergency and since they knew we were coming they took Berlin immediately from me.

Upon taking him out of the box he went into respiratory failure and stopped breathing. The doctors did CPR on him and revived him quickly (which they say is a good sign). He immediately started purring (thank goodness).

Berlin is currently in an oxygen cage and has been diagnosed with heart disease. The next 48 hours will be critical, if he survives.

The doctor gave me a funny statistic - they have a 75% success rate on CPR but those that are revived only 4% walk out of the hospital.

The doctor and I together made a decision to continue forward on medical services as long as Berlin isn't suffering.

Berlin has a rough night ahead of him, I hope he hangs in there.

Luckily, Animal Emergency is only 30 seconds from my house.

I didn't know they could do CPR on cats. I learned something new today. I never thought a 6 year old cat could have heart disease either.

It hit Alex earlier tonight that Berlin was most likely not going to make it through the night and he was very sad and empathetic to me. Alex has never had a pet and never experienced the death of a pet. It in no way can be compared to losing a human life (Alex's father passed away 12 years ago) but it is still very hard.

This so completely sucks.

Poor Berlin...

I came home to a very sick little cat last night. Berlin was lethargic and just sat on my lap for an hour. I contemplated taking him to the Emergency Clinic but hesitated since I really like and trust my vet. He made it through the night like a champ and the other cats stayed very close to him (big sign I knew something was wrong).

He's spending the weekend at the vet and so far all I know is that he has liquid around his lungs and heart, he's lost 3 pounds, his temperature is 5 degrees below average, he's dehydrated and in overall bad shape. He tested negative for leukemia and x-rays showed no obstruction in his stomach. The vet is baffled by the fluid around his lungs/heart and wants us to take him to Iowa State once he is stabilized.

He's spending the weekend in the intensive care unit of the vet's clinic on two IV's (one for antibiotic and one for fluid).

It's not been a good day. Alex has been really supportive and understanding. He got dressed last night and got the kennel out to take Berlin to the emergency clinic after I held the cat for an hour. He may not understand how I feel but he's trying his best to be supportive, for that I give him credit.

This just sucks.

My first Christmas

We spent last night with Alex’s mom and extended “border” family. We ate, we wrapped presents, we played games, we ate more, opened presents at midnight and then went to bed about 4am. It was a really great experience.

The day was amazing – I learned all about bachelor Christmas shopping as we scurried around the mall and shopped for half a dozen people in less than an hour.

I traded in my training wheels yesterday for my real engagement ring (the band came in!!):

A review of 2007 New Year’s Resolutions and my list for 2008

Looking back on my 2007 New Year’s Resolutions I grade myself a B+ as there are items I’m so very proud of myself for accomplishing and others I need to continue working on this year.

Last year’s resolutions with feedback (in Italics):

Health Resolutions:

1) Limit caffeine (I would aim for eliminating but I know me and know it’s just not going to happen) – I’ve minimized my intake of caffeine very recently as I eliminated coffee from my daily diet. This is a huge feat for me but it’s only been a few days and my 2008 resolution is to eliminate ice tea and caffeine altogether. In addition to eliminating caffeine, I am adding a resolution of drinking more water – a lot more water.
2) Get more sleep – exceeded expectations post August 2007
3) Visit the appropriate doctors I have ignored for the past many years – I’m one doctor appointment short of accomplishing this goal and it’s more because I’m looking to find a doctor who I can have for many years (pregnancies) and I’ve actually been researching a nurse midwife / ob gyn in Des Moines who I could be with for years versus a quick check up.
4) Lose weight – this is a recent goal I’ve just restarted working on and have a plan in place for success – more results to come in 2008.
5) Exercise – starting slowly and hopefully building up to the 5K Run for the Cure that I shook on with the Knit Wits. I don’t aim to walk, my goal is to run all of it. Even in my prime, I could never run long distances so this is a “reach” goal. I’ve been working out with a personal trainer for the past 3 weeks and not only am I losing weight, my back is phenomenally better, my endurance is growing and I feel energetic and focused. Thanks to my dad for a great wedding gift, I’m working out 3-4 times a week and even though I whine about the torture the results speak volumes. Working out has helped my back more than taking alieve, advil or seeing a chiropractor. The key is the personal trainer (Jeff) – he knows the right exercises to strengthen my back. Jeff will help me get in shape for my wedding, prepare for the 5K I will actually run next year and help me transform my body into good shape. This is a very late success but probably one of my exciting/rewarding resolutions of the year.
6) Use my Y membership – I cancelled my Y membership in August from more than 18 months of nonuse and joined the Aspen Club in the last month. The key is not the club, the key is motivation plus the personal trainer. The personal trainer is worth every penny. My back doesn’t hurt anymore, it’s absolutely shocking.

Financial Resolutions:

1) Create a Budget – done
2) Stick to the Budget – sort of done – I’m happy with my spending habits this year
3) Limit expenses where feasible – primarily Starbucks and yarn – done
4) Meet with a financial planner – I not only met with a financial planner, I dated, fell in love and am engaged to him – best resolution I made last year5) Re-evaluate savings / investing plan – done - completely reshuffled per Alex’s recommendations

Professional Resolutions:

1) Work smarter not harder – done post August 2007
2) Delegate and push back - done
3) Limit the amount of 20+ hour days (correlates to health resolution #2) - done
4) Continue to learn from those around – a continuing process
5) Challenge myself more - a continuing process

Knitting Resolutions:

1) Knit a project requiring a zipper – not done but I helped Karen with one, does that count?
2) Complete one crochet project – not done
3) Complete one intarsia project – I ripped out the one project I started
4) Complete one entrelac pattern (incorporate knitting backwards) – not started
5) Knit from my stash, knit from my stash, knit from my stash. – done and many ufo’s finished this year with many more to go
6) Challenge myself somehow – aran sweater, free form, my own design – something – no time

Other Resolutions:

1) Continue piano lessons – in process but I still suck
2) Try dance lessons – Alex is an amazing dancer who took lessons every week for three years – he’s going to teach me how to dance prior to the wedding
3) Be more honest with people – done, boy did Elvis and I have a heart to heart last year.
4) Say no more often - done
5) Dress better – I think I failed miserably here but will work on this is 2008.
6) Spend more time with my family - done
7) Take all 5 weeks of vacation time – YES and it was great – Italy, Spain, home, etc…
8) Avoid drama – I eliminated one person from my life and all the drama just disappeared...WOO HOO!!!
9) Balance out professional and personal life – YES but I think it’s due to falling in love
10) Try something new – does planning a wedding count???
11) Don’t take on other people’s problems – just work on mine - YES
12) Learn to cook – or better yet – learn how not to burn food – working on it slowly, I’m a good baker but we all have to start somewhere

New Resolutions for 2008

In coordination with rolling over many 2007 resolutions, here’s a list of the new 2008 resolutions:

1)Eat healthier
2)Balance quality time between Alex, friends and family
3)Improve my domesticity (laundry, dishes, cooking, cleaning, etc)
4)Maintain a high level of patience, especially through wedding planning activities
5)Don’t let work stress me out
6)Be happy
7)Keep the drama out
8)Take time to myself (knit, workout, read, etc)
9)Enjoy the planning process of getting married

I received the coolest gift from my friend Karen last night - the picture may be fuzzy (camera phone again...) - but check this out:




KUREYON SOCK YARN!!!

Doh! The flight delays...

Friday night is always a blast when stuck in random airports. Tonight, I'm delayed in Dallas but as you can or cannot (not a good camera phone) really tell from the picture below, so is everyone else. Misery does love company. If it were only as easy as clicking my heels three times.

The picture isn't clear but every flight but three out of the dallas fort worth airport on American Airlines is delayed.



I can think of one fun silver lining - I have the pleasure of arriving late tonight (hopefully if my flight doesn't cancel) to have an early morning trainer session followed by the weekly torturous piano lesson.

Am I bettering myself or am I masochistic?

How Alex loves the cats…

1) Alex busted Trouble sleeping with me all cuddled in the other night in a cat free zone (our bedroom) and not only looked the other way, he cuddled in as well

2) When the red couch went to live at Nancy’s house, a certain short, runty black cat sat staring at the window ledge since she didn’t have the couch to jump off of to sit on the ledge. Alex remedied the situation by putting a kitchen chair near the ledge so Moby could spend her day on the ledge

3) He talks to them all the time
a. It’s “Hi Gang, I’m home” when he walks in the door
b. It’s “Bye Cats” when he leaves

4) When he sits on the couch Moby will sit on the arm rest and head butt him while he plays with her

5) If it’s not Moby he’s playing with on the couch, then Trouble is sitting on his lap doing the “I love you” massage dance on his belly

6) He mops the kitchen floor with Trouble (who submissively rolls onto his back when he sees Alex)

7) He’ll do a daily headcount and say “I have seen X cat in a while…” and go looking for him/her

8) He’ll have an entire conversation with Trouble (who fully participates and responds)

For someone who claims to not like cats, he sure does like them.

How Alex loves me…

Alex is a good guy and in the spirit of misery loves company, he has decided to start working out with my trainer. I’m barely able to walk today after spending 4 sessions with the trainer in 6 days. When I told my mom she said “oh, he’s such a nice guy – he’s so good to you”.

Also, he ate my lasagna even though he hated every bite of it. I actually liked it. He loved me enough to not tell me he didn’t like it until after dinner. Made more sense when he ate 9 out of the 10 garlic breadsticks. This domestic stuff is challenging – at least I have figured out how to not shrink his clothes anymore (it’s unfortunately too little too late for some of his clothes).

Parental Lunch

Alex and I introduced our parents yesterday at a parental lunch.

Wait, I’ll rephrase that.

If we had been on time we would have beat both our parents to the restaurant so that they wouldn’t have had to introduce themselves to one another (they figured it out pretty fast without us).

Wait, let me rephrase that one more time.

If I hadn’t been running late, we would have been on time to properly introduce our parents.

I have a valid reason for running late – I could barely move. As a wedding gift from my dad, I started working out with a trainer on Saturday and had a second session on Sunday right before parental lunch. My back feels great and I’m working very hard to make it stronger. It’s everything else that hurts just horribly - my unused, lazy muscles are crying in protest.

I’m looking forward to enjoying working out – I’m currently not there just yet and it’s going to take a while to get motivated. The wedding is not the end goal for working out – I’m looking at the bigger picture of losing weight, strengthening my back and some of my old clothes fitting again. Exercise will be my stress outlet and a way to spend some much needed time to myself.

If I lose a pound a half a week every week between now and the wedding, I’ll be at the weight I was when I moved back to Des Moines almost 6.5 years ago.

Back to parental lunch – good food, good conversations and great beginnings. Alex’s mom and my parents really hit it off. There was a lot of wedding discussions and I still choked when my mom brought up wedding dress shopping. I still don’t understand the thrill of the wedding dress shopping; I’m dreading it. To me, it’s like being publicly weighed. I hate being on display. I need to find a non-fufu, non-super girly wedding dress that will go nicely with Birkenstocks and that goes well with my plus size figure. I found silver Birkenstocks that have little diamonds in them – I thought they would make great wedding shoes.

The wedding will be on a Royal Caribbean Cruise next August/September named Freedom of the Seas. The ports of call are Miami, Jamaica, Haiti, Grand Caymans and Cozymel, Mexico. We’ll be sending out packets of information to everyone shortly (as well as email to get everyone’s home address).

One last funny note worth mentioning – Alex and I watched a charity concert last night that occurred in England and one of the singers was wearing a gold sequined suit. I said how amazing that would be to have as the groom’s tux – Alex shut his eyes, took a deep breath, looked down and said “it’s your wedding day, I’ll wear whatever you want me to wear”. He’s such a trooper. I wouldn’t do that to him on our wedding day – I’d probably wait until we renew our vows on our 10 year anniversary.

12 days drug free

It’s not as bad as it sounds but to me it’s a huge accomplishment. Drugs to me are Alieve and Advil and at a minimum I used to take both of them every morning with breakfast. Anyone who suffers from body pain can probably relate to what I’m about to explain.

I have a bad back. I miss about one week of work every few years due to my back. I’ve survived numerous car accidents, spend anywhere from 10-20 hours on planes a week, sleep on hotel beds 3-5 nights a week, work extremely long hours at times and am very overweight.

At some point, taking Advil and Alieve every day was working less and less – my body had acclimated to the benefits of the pills and the affects were lessening. There were days when I would take the pills every three to four hours my back hurt so badly.

So what changed?

Me. I changed my mentality about needing to take the drugs. If it were bad enough to require taking something I would but I’m broke the daily dose.
Stress affects my back worse than lifting heavy objects. I have to consciously acknowledge stress and not let it affect me to the point that it affects my back.

I started stretching every day.

I don’t sit at my laptop for an extended amount of hours. I take walking/stretching breaks.

I have started exercising and will be starting with a personal trainer soon.

I went to my chiropractor. My back hurt pretty badly for a few days after he adjusted my back but it has been great since.

I have recognized that my period, change in weather and stress all affect my back and I now ask myself how bad is the pain really before reaching for any drugs. I would rather have my kidneys and stomach intact and a small amount of back pain versus the bad side effects of daily taking drugs with still having a small amount of back pain.

Wedding plans to be posted shortly - we have decisions, dates and places.

White Trash Insulation

The master bedroom in my house is infamous for being extremely cold in the winter and extremely hot in the summer. The bedroom is an addition to the house that is attached to the attic and on the third floor of the house which doesn’t permit the best air flow in the house.

It’s been so cold that cuddling has been renamed survival. The room is usually about 15-20 degrees warmer than the outside – which in these dropping temperatures is really cold.

My dad came over this weekend to help with the horrible curtain project and I asked for his opinion on the uber cold master bedroom. He walked around the room feeling the walls and window and found a major source of cold – the air conditioning wall unit. I may as well have the window wide open as the side vents of the air conditioning unit aren’t blocking any outside air.

To solve the problem my dad suggested insulating the sides of the AC unit. He went into great detail about insulation foam, how to make it temporary, etc.

I solved my own problem white trash style (if the Yarn Harlot can blog about a toilet seat, I can blog about insulation):



We used jeans and jackets to try to block the heat. I don't know how successful we were but we survived last night better than other recent nights.